Dear Coach Fisher,
As you are mulling over your options, please considering the following should you decide on Miami:
1. Miami is a special place and has special fans. Miami fans travel in droves to West and East Coast
2. Should you decide on the 4-3. Choose your defense wisely. Terminate the players who have less than 10 tackles And zero sacks. Keep guys like Odrick, Soliai, Langford, and feel free to add additional pieces. An injured Urlacher, unhealthy Briggs from Chicago would be healthy enough to dominate on the defense.
Please trade Koa Misi for a 7th rounder. Jeff Ireland can assist with getting value in the 7th round. He can be like a puppy dog on draft day. While you are out getting the “groceries” he can be on 32 phone calls at once getting value.
3. Do not run Reggie Bush on an Iso play or veer, ever! Let Reggie run wild out of other formations. Let him line up out wide in the slot.
4. Please keep Matt Moore because he is a leader and is good for any 8 games next season. Start whoever you want, draft whoever you want, and trade for whoever you want. I guarantee that after a 4-4 start, Matt Moore is your guy for the rest of the season.
5. Please upgrade the tight end position. Fasano has done well. We just need a fast explosive tight end see TE Chris Cooley in Washington or even Fred Davis. When in doubt take both!
6. If you draft a Wide Receiver, please find one to compliment Brandon Marshall. One that can drive Marshall to work so he doesn’t take a cab and talk to on the phone at night if he just needs a friend. One that can catch and hold on to the ball in traffic and is not afraid of the first down marker.
7. If there isn’t language in your contract about seeing your son play at Auburn on Saturdays, there really should be.
8. When considering what to do with Jake Long, ask him to go to the right side and then trade for a Left Tackle or acquire one in free agency. Long can stay healthier moving to RT.
9. The 8th or 9th pick should be converted into a first rounder and two second round picks. That’s it. Don’t get in the way of trying to draft a QB at 9/8 unless Andrew Luck suddenly slips and falls and requires surgery on his left arm. Then forget everything listed above and trade away picks and Jake Long, but only if you speak with Oliver Luck first.
10. Remember the first year is about beating teams in the division. Win those games. Don’t watch film on other opponents especially the ones in the NFC west. They all stink. Even the Rams a team you are considering. They’ll lose more because Bradford is a modern day Trent Green.
* Miami is not the place to live. Please live near the facility. We need to see your car parked there George Constanza style. We want you to work your tail off.
** When in doubt in game situations, field position doesn’t win ball games. Go for every 4th and 2 all game long. Don’t punt before a half if you are in striking distance. Don’t celebrate a field goal, ever! A golf clap will do. Use your mathematical intelligence from USC to calculate how many points you should win by.
If you meet all of these expectations, we will all, as Dolfans sport our own Mustache in celebration and welcome you with open arms.